Practice Changing Writer-Based to Reader-Based Prose

Adapted from http://www.english.udel.edu/writing/handouts/readerbased/writer.html

Instructions:  Read the following sample passage carefully, marking instances of writer-based prose.  Then, answer the questions below.

SORORITY LIFE

            Before I came to college, all I knew was that a sorority was a bunch of girls who called themselves sisters.  What a big family, I thought.

          But I found that a sorority is different from a family:  it is an organization comprised of ever-changing individuals bound together by common interests and purposes, but not by blood.  I went through the Rush process to find out which group of girls has the same interests and purpose as me.

          To be part of a Rush, I had to pay an entrance fee of $25.00.  Then the Rushing began.  First, I met the sisters from each of the sororities.  They asked questions to see if we had any “Common interests or purposes.”  After I met the sisters, I was offered invitations to come back to a function at those who thought we had similar interests.  I was told to accept seven invitations on the first round of bidding, then narrow my choices to five and finally to three.

          I had to attend all of the parties so that the sisters could make sure that we had something in common.  Finally, I decided which sorority I wanted to pledge.

Questions

1. Write down any examples of “code language.”  (Jargon, ambiguous language)   What does the writer need to do to make this language clear to the reader?

2. Write down any ideas in the paper that require further explanation or examples.  Make suggestions for how to develop these ideas (What kind of explanation is needed?  What kind of example would be appropriate?, etc.)

3. Is the writer’s purpose clear?  As a reader, do you care about what this writer is saying?  Why or why not?