In the tender moment a couple exchanges the
vows, “I do”, it is assumed among the couple and everyone in the audience
that the newlyweds are going to be in a marriage that is filled with love,
joy, and romance that lasts until death does them part. But in reality, not
every couple will experience a marriage that lasts a lifetime. According to
Business Insider in 2020, “[In America] 39% of marriages will end in
divorce” (McDowell, 2020). And compared to the rest of the world, America is
ranked number three out of the top ten countries with the highest divorce
rates (Guinness World Records, 2002). Divorce plagues the United States,
tearing families apart and leaving its victims feeling empty and hopeless.
What can married couples do to prevent themselves
from becoming another statistic? One way couples
can prevent divorce is through the understanding and application of the Five
Love Languages. Love languages is a term used to describe the five
generalized ways a couple can show and receive love within the relationship,
based on their emotional and physical needs. The term was coined by Gary
Chapman, the author of the book The Five Love Languages. To
understand what love languages you have, you can take the Five Love
Languages quiz by clicking the link at the bottom of the page.
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Physical Touch. Physical touch is the love language that is expressed
through small acts of physical contact.
Examples: A hug, a shoulder squeeze, or a kiss on the
forehead.
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Quality Time. Quality time is the love language that is
expressed through spending dedicated time with one another.
Examples: Spending time together watching the sunset or
baking dessert together.
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Acts of Service. Acts of service is the love language that is expressed
through sacrificing some time by doing something for your partner.
Examples: Filling up their gas tank,
doing the dishes in the sink, doing their laundry, or cooking them a meal.
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Words of Affirmation: Words of affirmation is the love language that is
expressed through kind and uplifting words, whether spoken or written.
Examples: Leaving a Post-It note on
the bathroom mirror with a kind message on it or making sure to compliment
your partner on something at least once a day.
o Gift giving. Giving gifts is the love
language that is expressed through giving small (or big) gifts to your
partner to remind them of your love.
Examples: Buying a small gift
spontaneously when you see something that reminds you of your partner or
putting extra though into anniversary or birthday gifts.
While understanding and applying the love
languages is not a full-proof way of preventing divorce, taking time to
understand your spouse and attaining to their top love language needs can
help improve the health of your marriage. And with a healthy marriage comes
love, joy, and romance that does last a lifetime.
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